Gone are the times when people stayed together under one huge house, altogether. Different jobs, different lifestyles, different requirements have moved people into different cities, which gave rise to the nuclear families. Everywhere we see, the families are more comfortable to stay away and alone with just the couples and children.
Busy and working lifestyle has made it hard for parents to give much of concentration on anything else outside their small family life and professional life. On a recent occasion, a friend of mine told me that her daughter does not prefer going to any family functions, as she finds it boring. My friend casually commented you know how today’s teenagers are? I wonder if there is a written rule book how teenagers should behave. If I am not wrong, the way today’s teenagers are something they have learned from us, the parents. We dismiss their behaviour blaming it on their age simply because we know it is not possible to correct ourselves.
So what are the things that need careful molding since an early age, so that they do not fall to the same teenage problems or teenage shyness?
Attending a cousin marriage, family parties and other gatherings not only helps you to build good relations, but it will also help your child get along easily with older people. It is important to develop an attitude where you can easily converse with a person whatever their age might be. I understand it can be stressful at times, but this is one of those things we do it for the good of our children future. When we avoid gatherings, children obviously learn the same.
Athithi Devo Bhava
After a hard working day, you have just returned home and about to make yourself a cup of tea, the doorbell rings. With heavy heart you open it and to your horror, you find yourself face to face with an unexpected guest. It is definitely hard to treat such unexpected guests in such situations. However, try to be open as much as possible. Being isolated without any people around makes your children emotionally weak as well as isolated. Trust me on this, in future even they will be as unwelcoming as you are now.
In a nuclear family of both working parents, it gets overly stressed out, as there will not be another person to share the work. For example, when a mother tries to be the cook, a maid, a babysitter, after spending hours in the office, it leaves less time to spend quality time with children and share the love. Welcoming another family member such as age-old parents and staying together will not only help your children to grow with love but also gives you a strong moral support.
Non-team player attitude
More the people, different the opinions. Children need to learn how to work it through conflicts and difference in opinions when in a team or group of people at the same time without disrespecting others. This gets difficult to learn in nuclear families as there are very fewer people who have different opinions. Usually, small families develop a certain boundary of like-minded thinking.
Although with many disadvantages, nuclear families are the most preferred because of the comfort, financial security, stability, and less stress. However, no families are perfect and it will always help to find ways to alleviate the problems of being a close-knit or an isolated family. After all, happiness is the ultimate goal of everyone. Help your children to learn the values of families, respecting their elders, and being a good and smart problem solver.