Communication is a learnable art! 57

Communication is a very powerful tool when you are a social being. The way you express your thoughts, the way you express your feelings, the way you give the message to the person sitting in front of you is very important.

Now, someone might think ‘how hard is it to communicate, after all you just have to go and talk ‘ No! wait, you don’t just have to go and talk. There is much more to communicating than just “talking”. Well, as a beginner who is in love with psychology I read an article recently which said that the little things you do, even the way your body is framed effects the conversation. It doesn’t mean you have to be conscious all the time while talking to someone but if you want someone to like you, or you are trying hard to get your message across the table then you can always use some tactics that can catalyze your process.

Here are a few things that can help you with that.

Your words

This is from my personal experience. I have always seen that the way people use their words sends in the message pretty strongly.
For example: ” I cannot meet you” or “I cannot meet you today but I will try for the next weekend” both of the sentences have the same intention but are received differently. One is negative and one is positive. The point being, that the way you use your words does make a lot of difference.

Your eyes

Ahh them eyes. Now, I am sure you must know this that eyes do most of the talking. If you are talking to someone about something very important or very personal I am sure you wouldn’t like their eyes wandering off every now and then. Wandering eyes whilst a conversation is a sign of boredom or uninterested mind. As a humble gesture, whenever someone speaks to you no matter how unimportant the topic might be to you, it’s always always polite to maintain a steady eye-contact, you never know how important the topic of discussion might be to the other person.

Your hands

Closed hands, or stiff hands, shows lack of confidence. I am a person who is very conscious while speaking in public or even in a discussion with my friends that’s why I move my hands a lot. A lot lot! That gives me a confidence and people take my point more seriously. Against that if you have closed or folded hands while you are talking to someone, can send in a message that you are not into the conversation.

Your body posture

If you are giving a speech or talking in general, a relaxed body sends in a sign that you know what you are talking about and you are confident enough. A stiff body shows lack of confidence.

Try talking than texting

Communication is not just verbal it can be textual also. In this modern world where everyone is just a text away, let me tell you that texts are very misinterpreted that’s why its always better to speak it out.

Approach people with a smile

I was talking to someone while writing this article and he told me that he always approaches people with a smile. There is a funny thing about a smile, it melts the heart. Not the creepy smile, but the ‘you are having a good day’ smile.

Again, what I have seen in my short lived life is when someone approaches me with a smile, I automatically turn soft towards them. So maybe, smiling does have a psychological effect on our brains and hearts too.

These are obviously the very basic but will sure make your conversational skills better. 🙂

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How I was Duped? 179

This happened many years back, probably in 2011, early months of my marriage. Till date, I still feel ashamed of my naivety. However, I would like to share my story with you all, hoping to warn, if you find yourself in any such a situation. Although I doubt anyone can be as stupid as me, but opportunist and cheaters are found everywhere. So be warned and be careful.

It was one of those busy and hot summer days and I was totally engrossed in my work at home when suddenly the door bell rang. I’ am always careful not opening the door to strangers and so opened the window to check who it was. There was a salesman who wanted to do a survey on a new toothbrush that was introduced into the market. He said he will give me three brand new toothbrush for free and he will be back after a week. I am supposed to use the brush and answer few questions for his survey. Along with that, he will also give me a ticket with a number which has a lucky draw. There were different prizes and if my ticket wins he will get the prizes along with him the next week. All in all, I thought there is no harm in taking those sealed brushes with the ticket. I took them and kept it aside and forgot all about it.

After a week, the same man appeared in front of my door again. I remembered him very well. He said I have won some gifts worth 800/- Rs items and he showed them all to me. He asked me for the ticket. I searched all around the house but in vain and told him that I have lost the lucky draw slip. He told me that there is another customer who have won a refrigerator and those people have shifted their house. He can give that lucky draw slip to me along with the other gifts that I have won and all I need to do is pay him 600/- Rs and I will be getting the refrigerator too. He said he will also give me his phone number and his office number if I need to check. For a moment I could not believe my luck and got carried away. For more than a year I was talking to my husband about buying a new refrigerator as ours was an old model and desperately wanted one.

Now, this man tells me that I would be getting a refrigerator of a lucky draw, was like a God sent a gift and I did not think further. Though I was doubtful, the man convinced me that I need to pay first as he needs to report about the changes in his office to send the refrigerator to my address. Finally, I gave in and paid him 600 Rs and took the other gifts. He said he will be back within an hour. Once he left, I had to finish some work. Later when I got free, I checked the other free items that he gave me and found them all used items and some of them broken though the packs were new. Then is when I realized of foul play and called the phone numbers he gave me. One of the numbers went to a gold shop and the other to a placement consultancy. I realized that I was duped by the salesman and there is no refrigerator on its way reaching our home.

I consoled myself thinking that I was lucky enough that the man did not hit me on my head and steal the house. I learned my lesson and since then I am always careful with people around who wants to sell something to us.

The True Face of a Resume!! 309

I am not sure how many of you believe in a resume but I for one, have never believed in one. It may sure tell us the educational details or some other information which a person can directly tell while in an interview. Sure it saves a lot of time, yet I wonder why an interviewer asks them again though. Such are the times our minds keep screaming “It’s already written in my CV, can’t you see it, sir/madam?” Oh! Well, our face might be deceptive at that time. A resume can never tell you so many things and a lot many times talented people may lose a chance of meeting their destiny or companies may not be able to hire good and talented people just because their resumes did not fancy the interviewer’s requirement. Given the chance to write one cool resume, what would you write? Here is mine.

Objective

To find a job that actually pays without asking me to work more than my limits, giving plenty of free time to relax and have a word with family and friends while I catch up with some of the work.

Personal Skills

a) I might be the first – in walking out of the office doors at the evening

b) The best talking and chatting companion you can ever find

c) cat-like reflexes- The moment you see me and decide there is something wrong in my work and needs discussion, Meow… I am not there.

d) I can sleep well any time of the day and anywhere.

e) I have good communication skills. By phone, by SMS, by group chats, by emails, and also through other Internet facilities that you provide.

f) I know my way around MS Word.

Experience

I am well experienced in any kind of arguments and can fairly win. I have a good experience in eating all kind of tasty vegetarian foods. I have good experience in trying to control gaining weight. I can tell you well as how to write a CV, just like this one. I am a good listener you see because I usually don’t try too hard to listen to what other person is talking. I am extremely good at researching on Google for information. Am a good dreamer, as I have spent most of my time in day-dreaming.

Education

I can read and write. I am educated enough to understand the basic languages ( ie., Hindi, English, Kannada and so on).

I have fairly got through a degree without trying too hard to pay off my pockets. Half way through various other certificate programs. We shall discuss that when we meet.

Reference

Me- Because who else can tell you better about me than I?

There, now you know everything about me, lets meet and talk about some important things that I might have missed mentioning here and you can give me the joining papers. You can also share what would be my salary on joining without feeling much shy. I am quite friendly and adaptable person.

See Ya soon,

XYZ

[Got any other crazy ideas for a resume. Share in the comments and let’s have a good laugh together]