Delhi Metro- har type ka koi na koi mil hi jaata hai. Right? 65

We have all been there, haven’t we…metro and the crowd. Rajiv Chowk, those office hours and the crowd. But there is something about the Delhi metro,  it’s like a good time pass…har type ka koi na koi mil hi jaata hai. Right?

Here are a few of them…of course, all from my personal experience.

1) The luggage carrier

They are the people who won’t just have one backpack on them. This kind does not understand the concept of travelling light. Bleh. No. They like carrying one backpack, one wallet (which they won’t keep in the backpack), two shopping bags and luggage bag etc etc. I wonder how do they cross over choked Rajiv Chowk metro station.
God bless these people!!

2) The baby-family

So, every time I travel in a metro there is at least one family with two or even three teeny weeny kids. No please pay attention, they aren’t the kind who will mind their business, sit with the family, listen to the adults. Not at all. They are the kind who will let everyone know about their presence in the metro. Looking at their cute sweet faces, your heart melts but very soon they get on your nerves – screaming, crawling on the floor, hanging, whining, shouting. And that’s scary for all single cool dudes and unmarried patakas in the metro! and me too! 😉

3) Chatter-batter

They are those chatter boxes usually, happens to be the girls who really don’t care where they are, who is listening, they just have to talk about the guy who was watching that girl in the cafe they are coming from, which was suggested by some Rahul or Raj Or how some B**ch who took away her boyfriend from her. They don’t mind letting the world know about it. Super cool!!

4) The couple

Now in every coach, there is always a sweetu shonu couple. You know those two in their own cute bubble who makes single people sick. Yeah, you got me. The most interesting part of having someone like that around you is the conversation they have. You hear all the words like jaanu, shona, nona, babu,cutie pie…the list is endless. It’s stupid and funny, but also kinda cute.

5) Depressed students

Since I am over that phase where I had to carry notes to the metro station because of some coaching exam the next day…I really sympathise with them but it also gives me an evil satisfaction watching the kids solving examples, reading for tests, discussing thermodynamics.  >>evil laughs<<

6) Silent judger

There is always this one person in every coach who observes everything and silently judges people…you can spot one with a weird smirk on their face.

7) Gyanchod

Now the conversation is very interesting when a two guys are talking and discussing something  almost everytime some third person, usually unknown- I call them Gyanchods, comes in between the conversation agreeing/disagreeing on the topic and before you know it, the population of the country is a problem, Modi’s politics has been discussed and the future prime minister is right in-front of us.

Do comment what type are you and also, do let me know of any type that you have observed but I have not mentioned 🙂

 

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How I was Duped? 148

This happened many years back, probably in 2011, early months of my marriage. Till date, I still feel ashamed of my naivety. However, I would like to share my story with you all, hoping to warn, if you find yourself in any such a situation. Although I doubt anyone can be as stupid as me, but opportunist and cheaters are found everywhere. So be warned and be careful.

It was one of those busy and hot summer days and I was totally engrossed in my work at home when suddenly the door bell rang. I’ am always careful not opening the door to strangers and so opened the window to check who it was. There was a salesman who wanted to do a survey on a new toothbrush that was introduced into the market. He said he will give me three brand new toothbrush for free and he will be back after a week. I am supposed to use the brush and answer few questions for his survey. Along with that, he will also give me a ticket with a number which has a lucky draw. There were different prizes and if my ticket wins he will get the prizes along with him the next week. All in all, I thought there is no harm in taking those sealed brushes with the ticket. I took them and kept it aside and forgot all about it.

After a week, the same man appeared in front of my door again. I remembered him very well. He said I have won some gifts worth 800/- Rs items and he showed them all to me. He asked me for the ticket. I searched all around the house but in vain and told him that I have lost the lucky draw slip. He told me that there is another customer who have won a refrigerator and those people have shifted their house. He can give that lucky draw slip to me along with the other gifts that I have won and all I need to do is pay him 600/- Rs and I will be getting the refrigerator too. He said he will also give me his phone number and his office number if I need to check. For a moment I could not believe my luck and got carried away. For more than a year I was talking to my husband about buying a new refrigerator as ours was an old model and desperately wanted one.

Now, this man tells me that I would be getting a refrigerator of a lucky draw, was like a God sent a gift and I did not think further. Though I was doubtful, the man convinced me that I need to pay first as he needs to report about the changes in his office to send the refrigerator to my address. Finally, I gave in and paid him 600 Rs and took the other gifts. He said he will be back within an hour. Once he left, I had to finish some work. Later when I got free, I checked the other free items that he gave me and found them all used items and some of them broken though the packs were new. Then is when I realized of foul play and called the phone numbers he gave me. One of the numbers went to a gold shop and the other to a placement consultancy. I realized that I was duped by the salesman and there is no refrigerator on its way reaching our home.

I consoled myself thinking that I was lucky enough that the man did not hit me on my head and steal the house. I learned my lesson and since then I am always careful with people around who wants to sell something to us.

The True Face of a Resume!! 284

I am not sure how many of you believe in a resume but I for one, have never believed in one. It may sure tell us the educational details or some other information which a person can directly tell while in an interview. Sure it saves a lot of time, yet I wonder why an interviewer asks them again though. Such are the times our minds keep screaming “It’s already written in my CV, can’t you see it, sir/madam?” Oh! Well, our face might be deceptive at that time. A resume can never tell you so many things and a lot many times talented people may lose a chance of meeting their destiny or companies may not be able to hire good and talented people just because their resumes did not fancy the interviewer’s requirement. Given the chance to write one cool resume, what would you write? Here is mine.

Objective

To find a job that actually pays without asking me to work more than my limits, giving plenty of free time to relax and have a word with family and friends while I catch up with some of the work.

Personal Skills

a) I might be the first – in walking out of the office doors at the evening

b) The best talking and chatting companion you can ever find

c) cat-like reflexes- The moment you see me and decide there is something wrong in my work and needs discussion, Meow… I am not there.

d) I can sleep well any time of the day and anywhere.

e) I have good communication skills. By phone, by SMS, by group chats, by emails, and also through other Internet facilities that you provide.

f) I know my way around MS Word.

Experience

I am well experienced in any kind of arguments and can fairly win. I have a good experience in eating all kind of tasty vegetarian foods. I have good experience in trying to control gaining weight. I can tell you well as how to write a CV, just like this one. I am a good listener you see because I usually don’t try too hard to listen to what other person is talking. I am extremely good at researching on Google for information. Am a good dreamer, as I have spent most of my time in day-dreaming.

Education

I can read and write. I am educated enough to understand the basic languages ( ie., Hindi, English, Kannada and so on).

I have fairly got through a degree without trying too hard to pay off my pockets. Half way through various other certificate programs. We shall discuss that when we meet.

Reference

Me- Because who else can tell you better about me than I?

There, now you know everything about me, lets meet and talk about some important things that I might have missed mentioning here and you can give me the joining papers. You can also share what would be my salary on joining without feeling much shy. I am quite friendly and adaptable person.

See Ya soon,

XYZ

[Got any other crazy ideas for a resume. Share in the comments and let’s have a good laugh together]