I got married in Dec 2016 with the guy I dated for over 3 years. In my mind marriage was just as my ceremony in the city hall – a legal binding for people who were already living with each other. Soon after the wedding news hit social media, I started noticing a shift in the way some people viewed me! My writings are often not read in very good taste – to everyone who likes to find reasons to be ‘offended’ – I am glad to give you one more!
Below are few very intriguing things people mentioned and some very hilarious questions I was asked.
The married attitude:
So apparently being married implies I would not go on any road trips with my guy friends. One of my friends pointed out that he was not sure if he could ask me as I was now married. I remember furrowing my brow, thinking hard if I was supposed to be offended in case a guy friend asked me out on a trip. Unfortunately, the social decorum gene has always been missing in me so this conversation was sort of an overhead transmission for me. Guy friends – ask away!
The married co-location:
So my husband and I not only stay in different countries but different continents! Yes, we are that bizarre couple and no, this was not planned. Numerous times I have been asked the timeline around which I am planning to move to India. An underlying assumption, of course, being that I will follow my husband across the continent. I really thought our generation was past this gender bias, but apparently many are still sticking strongly to the concept of the ‘following wife’.
Right after my trip home when I met my very sweet in-laws for the first time, many people were intrigued how the meeting went. I was more than happy to share. In the middle of the night yesterday, however, I decided to ask my husband if he was ever asked the same question, considering he has met my parents’ plenty and it is a common knowledge in his friend circle. The answer was no. I realised the concept of in-laws for many goes only one way! My husband meeting my parents is just not as shiny as me meeting his parents!
The new woman:
In the middle of crazy talks and random conversations that I am known for in my close circle, a few folks decided to share the conclusion they had arrived at: I was still the same Vidushi they knew before marriage. You have to admit this is stellar! Clearly, I was expected to experience a rebirth of sorts after marriage that failed to happen – God decided I was too much work. Hence, I was abandoned by God as the same person pre and post marriage! I guess pray for a successful transition to a married woman?
So these new findings and apparent rules (for many, not all) really intrigued me and I thought I would share them on social media in case someone with an unabashed self (like me) is completely missing this sense of the unsaid! Good luck and do share these intriguing little things that happen after marriage!