Why most of the mothers spoil their own daughter’s life. 1089

The lady, who is supposed to support you the most, the creator of you; your mother is actually the one who snatch away your individuality when in the same situations your brother is termed right and you are wrong and advised to be a ‘Good girl’.

Yes, fellow women, it’s our mother, it’s we as mothers who are responsible for the mess that we have in our lives and our daughters will have in their lives.

1. It was just today at the pool when a 6-year-old boy had an argument with a 5-year-old girl and the girl started shouting at him. Without wanting to know the reason, the girl’s mother told her daughter…’  Don’t shout on bhaiya..Girls don’t shout like this.’

So right from childhood, your mother takes away the right to express your anger and objections just because you are a girl.

2. Your brother can bring his girlfriends home and even allowed to move to his room with them but your boyfriends are not allowed even to the living room, if you do so, your mother will raise one thousand questions. She not only distrusts you but also warns you not to do this ever again.

3. Once you are of marriageable age, you are expected and taught to satisfy your husband’s physical desires and fantasies whereas stats prove that 80% of females don’t even know what it feels to have an orgasm.

Being a female, you should not demand any physical pleasure because you are given such ‘sanskars’ by your mothers that thinking of physical pleasure will label you as shameless and unconscionable but your male counterpart has all the privileges.

4. When you give birth to a female child, and your in-laws curse you only for not giving them a ‘Ghar ka chirag’. Then why can’t you tell all those b**tards that it was their son who was incapable of passing on those chromosomes that lead to the birth of a male child?

It is so because our mothers prepare us mentally to quietly take all allegations n shit that elders give you after marriage.

5. You are not supposed to work late in office. And you even being competent, abide by these rules coz for a woman career is the last priority as ‘family comes first’ is the concept that we are brought up with, while all males can happily enjoy peak in their careers.

This is what we have been made and we are making our daughters, an individual with no rights to expression, independence, enjoyment, speech, fun, pleasure etc etc etc…..

So fellow mothers, it’s time to change your mindset so that your daughters are raised rightly. Don’t suppress your daughter’s freedom, let her raise voice against any wrong happening to her physically and emotionally, make her career conscious and financially independent, hear and respect her opinions; don’t set boundaries for her, let her decide for herself.

It’s time to teach your boys that even she is a complete individual, not just the other half.

Trust me, if you stand for her today, she will stand for herself and her daughter tomorrow. Mothers, only you have the power to bring this change and pass it on to generations to follow.

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Let there be no other Pradyuman! 1926

 

Dear All,

This is an open letter to whomsoever it may concern, I am really shaken by the death of Pradyuman and series of events that have surfaced in different schools victimising little kids.

I am a mother of a 2-year-old child and the day I saw the news about the cold-blooded murder of a 7-year-old Pradyumn, I was left dumbstruck. Well, I never doubted the fact that human is the most dangerous animal but the way this little boy was murdered is…..no word can describe it.

I don’t know if there was something wrong with schools or there is something seriously wrong with the school management. But, another point that I would like to raise here is about the playschools.

I think most of the parents nowadays send their kids to playschool. It’s a place where children learn the basics of life and get geared up to enter the real world of schooling. But, have you noticed that there are so many playschools have mushroomed in every nook and corner of the city.

I just want to know how many such schools are affiliated or is there any system in place which assures that these playschools follow a set pattern. It might not concern a few but to many of us, it is a point of worry. Knowing the fact that our little ones are very small, they can barely speak clearly, they are too naïve to understand the ill-intentions and malicious thoughts; under such circumstances, there is a dire need to have a system in place which sets the certain protocol for opening playschools.

Even if there are parameters that need to be met to open playschool, it’s important to check for those schools which are running in a room or in a small area where no amenities are present.

What can we do as parents?

I agree to the fact that schools are the second home for a child but, taking into account the recent precedence, it is the time that we as parents take up the charge and become proactive.

If you are planning to enroll your child or have already enrolled then you must have these pointers on your radar-

  • You must know about the playschool and its staff.
  • Try to stay personally connected with the staff members and other staff of the school
  • Enquire about the verification procedure of the staff members
  • The schools should have enquired complete details about each member of the staff, starting from the teachers to the watchman
  • Enquire about the first aid facility available in the school
  • Make sure that you drop your child to his/her class
  • You should do a surprise check in the school
  • Don’t forget to meet your ward’s teacher regularly
  • And the most important thing, you should observe the behavior of your child. It’s very important that you must check if your child is happy to go to school and at the same time he/she is happy while coming back.

These are a few suggestions from my end, you can obviously leave your opinions and feedback on the same. Let’s promise to ensure the safety of our children and their childhood.

 

 

 

Why is ‘Adoption’ unapproved by society for an unmarried single parent? 1383

I was preparing for sleep last night when my friend Asmi called me up. She was sounding flustered. More than flustered, there was a rage in her voice. It happens rarely that Asmi cries. She is 30, strong, self-reliant and a career-oriented woman. She didn’t marry because she chose not to marry. There is no catastrophic heartbreak story behind. Her focus has always been on her career. She is practical and staunched.

I understood her heart is really heavy else there has never been any place for tears in her eyes.

I quizzed her the reason.

“I am not crying because am sad, I am crying because am helpless and exasperated.” Asmi retorted.

I didn’t interrupt and allowed her to put her heart out.

“Preeti, I called my mother last night and had an argument with her.” she continued.

“I told my mother that I want to adopt a baby. Before I could say anything further she started yelling at me. She scolded me saying, Asmi already because of your decision of not getting married we are in pain. Why are you adding troubles to our lives? If you really want to adopt a baby just forget us. We have to live in this society and will have to answer people around. You have always done whatever you want but this time you are crossing your limits.

If not today, maybe tomorrow you will get married. Who will marry a girl with one child? Such things appear good in movies only. You better start focusing on marriage now. Preeti, My mother wasn’t even ready to listen to my thoughts”. Asmi started sobbing.

I really had no words to console her. Her thoughts were irreproachable and valiant.

But we cannot even disregard the fact that we live in a hypocrite society. When celebrities like Sushmita, Angelina, Sunny and more adopt a baby, we eulogize, lionize, praise their thoughts and we consider it as an act of kindness. We appreciate their humanity. We deduce that they gave a new life to someone. But when anyone from our own house even thinks of adoption we make them go through ignominy by coming up with the questions like is there any medical issue? Are you not straight? Why don’t you marry and then plan your own baby? Why are you trying to shame your parents? Why don’t you understand this baby won’t be your own blood? Are you kidding? Etc.

I’ve read somewhere that parenthood requires love and not DNA. I wish we really understand that. Your genes won’t define your family, our family is built with love care and respect. There are many people who do have a heart for adoption but fear comes in between. Fear of society.

I wish people understand that adopting a baby whether you are single or married isn’t a crime.

Adoption will not only give a baby a family but will also give us a special feeling. A feeling of being human. Probably the purpose we all are here for, giving life a life.