Technology taking over childhood 167

All around us we can see who is ruling the world these days. Most of us will agree that it’s not us who owns a gadget but nowadays gadgets have learnt to tame us so well and our mastering our lives now.

Even our children and otherwise vibrant youth are in the grip of technology and all in the wrong way.

Many of us have raised our concern about this issue from time to time but what we have not discussed so far is the root cause of this issue, which of course has long-term effects on the growth of our children and their mindset. Along with these gadgets, there are other monsters in the form of social media app which have also taken all the innocence of our children. They are getting matured before their age.

Now even the children of the age group of 10/12 years have their own Facebook and Instagram account. They are pretty active on what’s app too and can be seen on what’s app till late at night.

I stood aghast when a mother of a four-year-old child told me that her daughter needs 15 minutes on iPad, after waking up in the morning, to come out of bed. Most of the time children are put in the front of TV to gulp down their food. They are given tabs/smartphones during journeys.Remember, what we used to do on the journey? I remember who were my pals of the journey- Diamond comics, phantom, Nandan, reader digest and many other books. Children these days are far from these. Even if they are reading they are offered kindle.

Now outdoor activities are limited to one-hour training of any sports class if the child is enrolled in the one. Most of the evenings are spent with the gadgets or at least till children are pushed out by parents.

The root cause of this problem, in my view, is:
• Nuclear Family
• Less active socially and more active on social media
• Parenting style

Most of us were raised in the joint family set up so we were always surrounded by our loved ones when we wanted any help or if we wanted to share anything. We always have our cousins as our first friends so we were never out of the options of whom to play with. Nowadays not only the nuclear family is in trend but also the size of the family has reduced or the age difference between the kids is so much that they can not, most of the time, relate to each other. And if both the parents are working then, in this case, a child does not have many options and feels safe and comfortable when surrounded by friends online.

When both the parents are active on social media more and have a less social network outside the social media then children are more likely to follow this trend.We should restrict ourselves first before preaching it to our children. When we will spend our time with family, talking to them and spending quality time with each other then children can surely be kept away from the gadgets. For a better tomorrow take a leave from all social networks and gadgets at least on weekends. It will recharge you as well. Challenge yourself to stay away from your smartphones and other gadgets on weekends.

Now, last but not the least, parenting style to be blamed if our children are not listening to us. I hope you all will agree to this. Parents can be liberal but their involvement in child’s life is very important and it cannot be replaced with any gadget. Even if you can’t restrict their social media usage, they should be taught about the pros and cons of using the social media. With proper knowledge and education about it, the dangerous side effects of these social media networks can be avoided.

With our efforts, our children can have a better tomorrow. Let’s raise our children with responsibility.

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“I Fear a Relapse”, Says Deepika Padukone. 1359

The trailer of the most awaited Padmavati movie was released making us wait on a tiptoe for the movie to be released soon which is actually on December 1st, 2017 (See the trailer here). While on-screen Rani Padmini fights for her honor, the actress who plays the role, Deepika Padukone is fighting altogether a different battle in her real life.

While shooting for the Happy New Year movie, Deepika was fighting her inner battle of depression. Although she did not realize it then. Her mother who came to visit felt there was something wrong and requested Anna Chandy, a psychiatrist from Bengaluru to talk to her daughter. Though Deepika ignored it for a period of time, she finally recognized her problem and took steps to cure it. However, in a recent event, while talking about the Jauhar scene of Rani Padmini in the movie Padmavati, she revealed that she lives in a constant fear of a relapse of depression. She said “ I don’t think, I am completely over it. There is always a fear of relapse as that phase when it happened is the worst experience in my life”.

Since her opening up about her condition in public, there are numerous articles written about depression and there are plenty of suggestion available for someone who is looking for help. But, the truth is a lot many of the population who are suffering from depression do not know that they have it and they need help. Most of them try to think it is nothing but stress, fatigue and they are over-worked.

Like Deepika said in one of her interviews earlier while talking about her feelings during the time, being sad and being depressed are two different things. When someone is sad, they look sad, but when someone is depressed, most of the times they hide it. They try to behave normally while the feeling of emptiness keeps nagging at them. You do not have to be poor or have to lose something in life to be depressed. Sometimes the feeling of depression has no reason.

How to recognize the signs?

When someone is depressed, you may notice certain changes in them. Such as,

  • Less interested in daily activities
  • Loss of appetite and weight changes (can lose or gain)
  • being angry and irritable most of the times
  • less energised
  • self-loathing
  • reckless behaviors
  • Change in sleeping patterns

These are some of the changes we notice in a depressed person, not for few days but on a regular basis. If you spot these in someone or if you are facing it yourself, get help. There is no age or gender who are affected by depression.

Recognizing and understanding the symptoms of depression is the first step to finding a solution. Once you know, meet a good psychiatrist and get help. There is no shame in finding help to cure a mental illness. We meet our doctors for physical illness. In the same way, sometimes our mind also need that extra help too.

Do not, I repeat do not ever be afraid to ask for help!!! Because you might be surprised that there are so many good people around you who really care and want to help you.

Marriage – the funniest ironical institution in India 225

Many people would not be able to figure out the mistake in the following figure. Well, there is no grammatical mistake, there is no printing error or any other fault in it. If you still haven’t figured it out, I have an answer for you, I would like you to face the ironical reality of the modern world or the 21st century where the thoughts and ideologies of Paleolithic age still prevails.

Women have always been considered as a pillar of the society, we have given her various names, we worship her, pamper her and consider her to be the live giver; there is nothing wrong in it. However, it blows my mind to see such kind of ideas still prevail in the society. I personally feel that a woman gets a chance to change her life, the first time she is born, the second time her life changes when she gets married and the third time she changes her life when she gives birth to a new life. But, amidst all this ebb and flow of life cycle, why is there a question that she needs to answer every time. Why is there a need to prove that she can equally love her parent and in-laws? Well, if you feel that I am proclaiming something different, then you must have a look at the picture here.

I find arrange marriages to be the funniest institution in India. Irrespective of the fact that I am a party to it, I still believe that it has some funny traditions and beliefs flowing in it. I would like to highlight a few-

  • The first thing that we say in India is, “Shaadi hamesha barabari ke khaandaan mein honi chahiye (One should get married in a family who is equal in status with the other),” Well, if that is true, why this equivalence is only restricted to money, why no one questions on thoughts, beliefs, ideas, vision etc. Yes, money is important to run a family, but imagine a situation where you have a big house, a big car etc. but both husband and wife are never on the same page. Is that the mantra for a happy married life? At least I don’t feel so.
  • Another popular phrase which we commonly here during the marriage is that “Shaadi to parivaaro ka mail hai ( Marriage is not between two people, it is the bonding of two families,” if that is so, why a girl has to put her in-laws first and ignore her parents. If that’s not the truth, I would again request you to run through the picture above. Why can’t both the families co-exist. Although, things are changing, the ground reality is different.
  • One of the common things I have heard is, “ Ladki ko sasural ke hisab se adjust karna chahiye (girl must learn to compromise and live as per her in-laws and husband),” there is nothing wrong in it and I too believe in it, but what if we tweaked this scenario, like both the parties can make slight adjustments so that everyone is happy and the guy or the husband doesn’t have to take sides.

What I have written is not new or neither revolutionary, I have actually started to find our society to be hilarious. We are never in a phase to create an equal world, rather we always pester on the fact that one has to be above, I think this hierarchical ideology is still haunting us since the time of Britishers. I don’t know how much change will come in the times to come, but, even if one person transforms after reading this, I will feel content.